RENT: a year in the life
by P3
Summary: December 1992. Mark realizes what his closest friends feel about the past three years.
1. Roger's Screening

**RENT: a year in the life**

**Chapter One: Roger's Screening**

Roger shifted on the uncomfortable wooden stool. He sighed and ran a finger over his hair, moving part of his bangs out of his face. Three years. Three long years, and though being in front of the camera a lot when Mark was around hadn't changed, he found himself at a loss for words as he stared at the camera's lens.

"Mark, can we hurry this up?" he said, with a hint of boredom in his voice.

"Yeah, yeah, just gotta finish cranking this damn thing." Mark looked up at his friend and adjusted his glasses. "Why are you in such a hurry? Not like you have anywhere to go." Without waiting for a response, Mark began to put the finishing touches on the setup.

Roger grunted. "As a matter of fact, a bunch of us were going to get together later. You were invited, but…"

"And you're telling me this _now?_" Mark pulled a paper out of a script that was laying behind him on a chair and wadded it into a ball, throwing it at Roger.

Roger laughed and dodged the projectile. "Calm down, I just found out about an hour ago."

Mark sighed and said, "Let's begin. Christmas Eve, 1992. 4:13 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. First subject: Roger." Roger gave a shy smile and a small save to the camera. "It's been three years since everyone got together. We've been through a lot. When was your toughest time?"

"Oh god, Mark…" Roger shifted again. The question posed called for him to bring memories back to life. Memories that he tried hard to forget. "Well, the first that comes to mind is almost losing Mimi. Well, I did lose her, but I mean losing her… completely. I didn't know what to do when I found out she was using again. Then she went missing, and…"

Roger's eyes filled up with tears and he looked down, rubbing his brow. "I couldn't bear losing another girl I loved. After April died, I fell apart… you know, Mark, you were there. I couldn't live because the one thing I lived for wasn't there for me anymore. I guess Collins and I have that in common: losing the one we loved. It crushes you. You can't begin to know what it feels like if you haven't lived through it. You can feel your heart cracking on the lonely nights. And when the rain comes down, you doubt everything you've ever done.

"Then Mimi came along, and the moment her candle's wax burnt my skin, the cracks in my heart were starting to repair." For a brief moment, lyrics came into Roger's head: _I'd forgotten how to smile until your candle burned my skin. _"And, as I told you, I almost lost Mimi for good. That was my hardest time in the past three years."

The crank on Mark's camera stopped and he looked at Roger. His words were more than he had expected, and they brought tears to his eyes.

Mark set his camera down on the chair and walked to his friend, rubbing his back supportively. "Go on. Tell Maureen she's up."


	2. Maureen's Screening

**RENT: a year in the life**

**Chapter Two: Maureen's Screening**

Mark's setup was cut off from the rest of the loft by a bed sheet pinned to opposite walls. Roger rubbed his eyes and walked into the loft living room, where Joanne, Maureen, and Mimi were sitting on the cough laughing and talking.

"Maureen, you're up," he said, taking a seat by Mimi and giving her a gentle kiss on the forehead.

Maureen rubbed Joanne's thigh and stood up, making her way towards the screening area. She gave a kind smile to Mark, whose heart was beating anxiously as soon as his eyes met hers.

"Just… sit there." He pointed at the stool weakly, acting as if he were more interested in the camera than Maureen.

"What's up, pookie?" she asked innocently. As if Maureen could be innocent.

"I'm just going to ask you a question or two, you know, to get some background information." Mark began to crank the camera. He made sure Maureen didn't see him look at her from time to time.

Maureen smiled, thinking this operation dull. She crossed her legs and sighed. Mark had definitely changed, though the change might not have been drastic. When she was with him, he was meek, afraid, shy. She guessed after she left him for Joanne was when he started to come out of his shell. He became more outspoken, more daring. He became the man she always wanted him to be.

"We're ready." Mark's voice snapped Maureen out of her thoughts. "Christmas Eve, 1992. 4:24 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. Second Subject: Maureen." Mark lowered his head so that he was watching Maureen through the lens. "Maureen, when did you realize that you needed to change?"

"What do you mean?" Maureen asked meekly. She knew what he meant, though she didn't want him to know that. She knew how she used to be… flirting with anyone and everyone who flirted with her, whether she was taken or not.

"I think you know what I mean."

And there it was. Maureen knew Mark knew her a lot better than most people, maybe even more than Joanne, but yet, she underestimated him sometimes. She crossed her arms over her chest and sighed. "Yeah, I do know what you mean. I guess when I realized I needed to change was when I saw Joanne crying after Angel's funeral because of the things I had done to her. I guess I never realized how much she loved me, and how much she wanted me to love her like that."

_Didn't give an inch when I gave a mile…  
I'd be happy to die for a taste of what Angel had.  
Someone to live for, unafraid to say "I love you."_

Mark cleared his throat when Maureen had obviously zoned out. She jumped a little and let out an embarrassed chuckle. "Sorry." She shifted on the stool. "Sometimes I wonder why I was the way I was. I had a good life growing up, got all the attention I ever wanted, plus more. I guess I wanted more than that. I wouldn't settle for the limelight. I had to be the star of whatever was going on, whenever it was going on.

"I'm just glad I'm different now. I know I hurt a lot of people, and I'm sorry, Mark."

Maureen's eyes grew wide when she realized what she had said; she noticed Mark's eyes had done the same as he stopped looking through the lens.

"Maureen…"

"No, no, I-" She knew this might be a mistake, but she'd been meaning to tell him this for a while. "I'm so sorry for what I did to you. You didn't deserve it, Mark."

"I know I didn't."

"I don't know why I did it, so I can't give you an explanation. But I'm asking to be forgiven."

Mark sighed as the camera's crank came to a stop. He looked at Maureen. "Come on, let's go see an old friend."


End file.
